"The Talk"

Big SIGH! I can't believe I'm having to walk this rite of passage already. My daughter just turned 9 a few days ago! YIKES! The talk I'm referring too is the one that explains what happens to a woman's body once a month. The other talk is "The BIG Talk" this is just the talk. Nonetheless, one I have thought of how I was going to handle since I found out I was pregnant with a girl. Yep, I'm one of those paranoid over achievers, that thinks of all kinds of crazy things, way ahead of time. I imagined us sitting together, having this wonderful mother daughter moment. I don't know why?! That's NOT how it happened in my world. NOPE, not at all.
In my world we went on bathroom break as a class in the 3rd grade. Then the group of girls that were in the bathroom started screaming cuz "Lina" was bleeding and we thought she was gonna die! Our poor teacher had to deal with us and our curious faces the rest of the day. She told us to ask our parents to explain to us what had happened. I did. My mother did not want to tell me. She made me wait a few days, until I had pouted enough. Gosh, the torture. I can't imagine being a mother of one of the boys in class and having him come home and ask me that.
Then again, my daughter did ask me the other day, "Mom, what does horny mean?" Talk about wanting the earth to swallow you up. Apparently, some girls at school know what it means, and she didn't, and they made fun of her. JOY!
Back to the present. My daughter's talk didn't happen that way either! So, my beautiful mental mother daughter moment never happened. Nope. Not at all that way. While away this weekend, my daughter "confirmed" what she had already been told by a friend at school. Yeah, two of her other friends mother's told me they had the talk with them. Apparently, a book was shared and questions were answered. So, this weekend.... My lovely God Daughter who is a few years older and has walked through "the moment" shared some of her knowledge and confirmed, elaborated, on the process. The best part, when my GF told me that she already knew, I tried to be in denial. My daughter walks into the kitchen and my GF says, "Carson, when your Mom talks to you about your uterus shedding, act surprised okay?" Carson say, "Cool" in her non-chalant I don't care right now, nine year old manner and walks away.
Great! Gotta love it! I did try and create my moment and sat with her recently and asked her if she had any questions about "her uterus shedding" and she said no. I had not heard her say it. I asked her, do you know what it is called? She would not say it. We play a game, where she is the mom and I am the daughter. So, I acted like I was the daughter wanting to know what it is called. Finally, she said it. It's called a period, MOM! I asked her, why isn't it called a question mark? : )

The Big one, three!

Yep, 13 years of marriage! Whew, honestly didn't think I would ever say that. Not cuz my marriage is on the rocks or anything, cuz I never thought I was gonna get married!! Much less last 13 years. I guess this is a great place to tell the story of how I met my other half. Actually, we will skip the how we met. Let me sum it up by saying, we were married 15 wks and 4 days after we met! There, eloped to the Grand Canyon. What a blast that was!
We live almost completely in between both our families. I am from El Paso, and he is from upstate New York. Being as we have no family here, we seldom get "childless" nights. We were blessed to have a dear GF of mine keep our children for the weekend. She lives out in the country. Not the country as some people call it today, but like the country, country. My kids got to DRIVE 4 wheelers, and go carts all around their property. My son actually tried capturing crawdads from a creek! Pretty adventuresome for that city boy. I really think they had more fun that we did. We found ourselves kinda lost...... I did not make any plans, even though I had a few days to think of what we could do. It never fails when I count on the kids being gone, something happens. One year for our anniversary we had arranged for the children to each be with their own friend. BOTH sides cancelled on us. I did not want to get my hopes up. We did have a nice leisurely breakfast out, then went to some way over priced antique shops. I have to applaud hubby for actually going to see a chick flik with me. FYI, don't hurry to go see the new What Happens in Vegas movie. It's ok, that's about it. Very predictable and boring in parts. It's funny, cuz we were invited to a cook out, but it was an hour drive away and there were going to be tons of kids there. That one didn't make sense. I also had talked to another friend of mine and we were gonna go out for sushi. When time came, I was not in the mood to "doll up." My, how we get set in our ways. All in all we have had a nice quiet time together.

Where has Chica been?

I have been nursing my aches and pains! This gym business is killin my bodd! I'm not taking this too well. I have been having leg cramps in my water class. I started cardio and thought I was going to stroke. (I know I should not joke like that, but I felt HORRIBLE! As a nurse all kinds of horrible things cross your mind! I thought, great do I have any ID on me? How embarrassing will that be? How will they get me out of here? How many men will it take to lift the stretcher? Will I ever be able to walk back in here? Those kind of crazy things go through your mind when you feel your heart beating out of your chest.) I realized how bad it is. I have been trying to do better in the nutrition department, then comes Mother's Day. Which btw, Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's!
I had asked to go to a "home tour" for my gift. Who doesn't love going into other people's houses and seeing how they live. What color are the walls? Where do they store there "stuff"?!! This was a tour of some "high dollar" historic homes. I have to say..... I was NOT wow'ed! Don't get me wrong, some of the houses architecturally were gorgeous, but as far as "decorating" goes......
It was a major disappointment. One house had 700 snow globes throughout the house! WHY?!! Another house belonged to a junk dealer and literally that gorgeous house was FILLED beyond the brim with nothing but junk! So sad! One lady made me laugh, she said out loud that she did not think that was appropriate to be listed on the home tour!! OMG! The most interesting thing was how these homes get restored. Some of the wood work is gorgeous. The history behind the homes, being torn down to the bare bones and built up again. One house had been badly burned and redone. That was the beauty of it. Unfortunately, we went on the hottest day so far! It was sooo muggy. No breeze what so ever. I think I sweated (is that correct english?) more than walking the treadmill for 45 min! It was miserable. Then, today.... it is gorgeous and cool outside. Great! We went out to a late, late lunch after we had enough of the tour. There were 11 stops on it, we lacked two. One of those was a house that was just bare bones that you could tour to get a glimpse of the before. It would have been fun, but it was terribly miserable and the buses were packed and taking forever to come around. Standing out in the heat waiting for them got old fast. Once we got on, in the A/C, there was no getting us out. After lunch we came home and I remembered I had been given an open invite to a friends house to jump in her pool. I called and it was still okay to come over. That water never felt so good. It also nursed my legs. My knee, I have mentioned before with the torn meniscus is not happy about going up and down all those stairs. Many of the homes were three stories! I was surprised at that. After our swim, it was late and dark. We came home, cleaned up and veg'ed out in front of the TV some. All in all it was a great day. I'm wiped today and after my breakfast in bed, went back to sleep and slept through my alarm for church. Disappointed about that, but guess my body needed the rest. We shall see how next week goes at the gym, and if kickin up my cardio is doing any good.

My Deviled Egg Eatin' Dog

I have two dogs. One Jack Russell and one huge "SPCA Special" as I call him. He is a mix of who knows what. He was rescued from the SPCA about an hour from here. He was taken to his 2nd home that we know of, which was my co-workers house. "WE" got him when she had had enough of him, chewing and destroying her house. He is part Lab and part Great Dane that we know of for sure. When we first got him, I did not think we were going to make it with him. If you have read the book about "Marley," well, I think our "Luther" is related to him. After almost 4 years we have grown to love him dearly. Today, we were coming home from Carson's opthamology appointment (which is another long story) and I turned down the alley when I noticed two kids poking at my dog with a long stick over the fence. I was immediately furious! I slammed on the gas and the horn, trying to get there as fast as possible and get their attention. I rolled down my window and told the boy to leave my dog alone. His friend thought it was hilarious that he had been caught. My blood was boiling! I may not have stressed how HUGE Luther is. He weighs almost 100 lbs and has these long legs, that when he jumps it's very intimidating. My mind was racing. Ya know, if my dog had broke the fence down and my dog had done something to that kid, who would have been reasonable? US of course! That makes me furious! They come down so hard on dog owners when they bite kids, but I bet if dogs could talk we would find out the truth about what provoked them. I know not all cases, but some. This would have been one of them. My dog was soooooo wound up! His hair was standing on edge along his back, like a cat. Who knows how long they had been there. I would like to think not long, but he was so wired up. I should have followed the boys, but my priority was to check on my dog. I feared finding him bleeding, or wounded. Amazing, how we become so attached to our animals. He thankfully was not hurt that I could see. I kept him in the rest of the afternoon. In the evening it was BEAUTIFUL out and I decided he needed to go run around. There is an elementary school behind our house. They have a small fenced in area that I sometimes let the dogs run around in. It's about the size of 4 backyards, so I guess not that small. We were leaving the school and I noticed Luther was not on his leash anymore! OMG! Needless to say he got to run more than I had planned. We finally chased him down and took him for a ride in my husbands Camry. Luther is so big, that his butt was in the seat and his legs hanging over the edge and his head looking out the windshield just like a person! It was hilarious! We had some good laughs with him this evening. I call him my deviled egg eatin' dog, cuz for some reason he LOVES deviled eggs. Guarantee a few will be missing if you leave your plate unattended. Today was just a reminder of how far we have come with him. I know if his previous owners could see him now, they would definitely want him back. He is our gentle giant. Thank God for the dog angels that watched out for him while we were not home.
Finally, Finally, Finally! I did it! I made it to the gym THREE time this week. I was so wiped today, I took a ginormous nap! Yee-ha for me! Ok, next I need to work on the "nutrition" portion of this healthy lifestyle as well as getting myself to the gym. Notice I said nutrition and not DIET! ok, just checking.

15.5 lbs to go!

This is not a goal for me, but a goal for my workout partner! She said when she loses 15.5 more lbs she will have reached a personal goal and wants to take a "girls getaway" trip! The best part is I get to come along! Yee-ha! You bet I'm calling her to get to the gym as much as possible now. Truth be told, I have only been away from the hubster and kids only ONCE! Next month is our 13th Anniversary. I know some people can't even grasp that thought. A few years ago my BFF and I went on a getaway and it was a blast! We rode waverunners and did whatever we wanted when we wanted! It was so much fun! Then, she got pregnant..... see what happens when you go away and come back! So, now that she has a lil one we have not gone anywhere. I hope hoping to change that soon. Wait, not so true. She broke her leg and that's when she got pregnant. Her husband said, it's cuz he didn't have to chase her anymore! I had planned a trip to Vegas for my ahem... 21st Birthday!~
LOL It got cancelled cuz my GF in New York renigged on me! Actually, everything happens for a reason, cuz we would have been off today and her Dad had unexpected major heart surgery today. I guess Divine intervention saved us the unrefundable airfare. I stepped on the scale and just hate it when that needle points in the opposite direction. I'm taking my scale in to get checked, it MUST be broken. Yeah, right! I have a mantra, '08 will be Great! I keep telling myself this and trying to keep a positive attitude. No matter how high gas prices get!
"I" really need to set a goal. My hospital decided that we must all wear the same color scrubs. JOY! I refuse to buy new scrubs in the current size I am in. I have to move, move, move. How I wish I had personal connections to Jilian the trainer from The Biggest loser! I so need her type of training. The tough love kind.

Rosacea

Wow! I can't believe it's been a week since I last posted. Ok, I did get to the Dr. Long story short, his practice s*cks. He prescribed two creams and oral antibiotics (which I have tried before with my PCP) His diagnosis was SEVERE Rosacea with cystic acne. He swears it's not the makeup. Ok, dude. Time will tell. I went on Wednesday and my face feels a bit better. No more burning, but the itching remains. It looks 1/2 a hair better. So at least we are moving in the right direction. I was pretty bummed about the rosacea issue. I know my hormones are all screwed up, which just makes matters worse. I actually went out of my way to get to the gym and attend a class at a different location, just cuz I like that instructor. It was worth it. My body felt it, that's for sure. I love being outside and with this rosacea it is going to be challenging this summer. I am a sun goddess. I love to turn crispy brown. LOL I may have to find some other form of destruction. I know people with skin cancer, and I am not poking fun. It is not a good habit. Neither is smoking, drinking, or overeating for that matter. I even made it to church today. Pastor spoke about "livin like a dog" and it was very interesting how dogs go back and eat their vomit, and we continue to do destructive (addictive) behaviors. Of course, I have done his sermon no justice, but hope you get the jest. As you can see my brain is bouncing around tonight. I'm hittin the hay, so I can get to water class in the am. Oh yea, guess I should mention I had a major moment of weakness and baked brownies. I did call my neighbor and her BF to come over and have brownies sundaes so they would vanish quicker. It worked, they are all gone, so I had my portion and no more temptation.

What People Say.

Sometimes you just can't believe what comes out of a person's mouth, can ya? I know I have mentioned my latex allergy before. Well, what I may not have mentioned is that I am currently discovering that I am having issues with makeup. There seems to be something in them that "resembles" the chemical make up of a latex protein. My body does not know how to tell the difference. My face is taking a toll. I look like a teen going through puberty twice. I have NEVER had skin issues. Never had blemish's in high school, or later. Well, I am paying now. My reaction looks like I have been burned (redness) along with what looks like acne. Maybe part of it is, but not all of it. It hurts like the dickens, and acne doesn't hurt like this. It itches, it burns. Anyway, I was at work and this housekeeper begins to inquire about what is going on with my face. Now, mind you, I don't know her very well. I raise my children to value people and respect them. I know you may have read the email about the teacher that gave the question about extra credit if they could name the housekeepers name. I like to be friendly to all. I always say hello to her, move out of her way, if it will help her clean. She has a job to do, as I. I have never discussed anything further with her, other than how are you? So, she turns to me and says, "What is wrong with your face? It looks bad! You have an allergy or something?" Now I am a blink away from tears, people! I about wanted to die. I have tried making appointments with dermatologist and apparently it is a booming practice and availability is months away. I have been trying everything under the sun, to try and fix it. So, needless to say, it has been a down weekend. I am now SUPER SELF CONSCIOUS about this. I finally have an appointment this coming week. Wish me luck!
Finally, my butt continues to grow. Very frustrating! I have decided I need help. This week I am looking into programs like WW, Jenny Craig, Nutra Systems etc, to see what I think will fit me best. I saw a friend recently that got the lapband and has lost 75 lbs! Wow, good for her! We all want that instant gratification. I'm at a low. This is the time I have to dig deep.