Friday, February 13, 2009

Dancing In The Rain


I have a "blurb" if you will, on my facebook page. It reads: Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain. I have been waiting and waiting for this "storm" to pass. I am learning to dance in the rain now. I have to give glory to God today. Glory to God that my brother went to his home, to rest in his bed, for what will be his final days. My gut was telling me he was holding out for some reason. He has refused food for about 3 days now. He stopped taking his meds and refused them inserting a nasograstric (NG) tube. I just learned that he also wants his dialysis turned off now that he is home. I also know that Hospice is now involved. My sister-in-law is dealing with so much right now. My mother with her Parkinson's is not doing much better. We had to put Mom on Valium. Not fun. I can not, nor want to imagine what it would be like to see your son dying. My brother is her oldest child. This will leave only the "girls" in the family as my father has been gone for 23 years now.
My birthday was miserable!! I have never had such a birthday. I am glad that he did not go on my birthday. Mom's birthday is 2 wks from mine. The Dr said it could take anywhere up to 2 wks. I hope it does not go that long, for the sake of my brother and sister-in-law. I pray that he go peacefully, and without pain. I pray my sister-in-law have peace in her heart. I have had a headache for THREE consecutive days now. I know it is all stress.
On a brighter note. I mentioned in my previous post that God would take care of our needs. I just want to mention that we got an unexpected check in the mail!! It was not a large amount, but every penny helps. My husband also got an unexpected bonus this week. That too was not a large sum, but it helps. These 2 checks allowed me to pay 2 bills that were due. Praise God!!
I have always loved a slow gentle rainfall. I love standing there and feeling the raindrops gently wet your skin. I feel it is cleansing. I guess that is what is going on in my life right now. I have made some MAJOR changes in my life that I will talk about later, but I know I am NOW dancing in the rain!

2 comments:

MaBunny said...

I'm glad your brother made the decision to go home. At least he will be in familiar surroundings when the time does come. I'm so sorry you had a crappy birthday, that is not fun...
/hugs

Michelle Kemper Brownlow said...

This post brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry for your family and pray for peace for your brother!

Maybe you can smile a little while answering your Mommy Blogger questions...email me so I can send them to you...
michellebrownlow@yahoo.com