So I stepped on the scale and things are not looking good.
I know I am now home FT. This is different. I was thinking
about how I felt when my brother passed. I literally had NO
appetite. That was the first time in my life that I have ever
truly felt such sorrow. I have suffered several MAJOR loses in
my life. Some I have never talked about. Even then I did not feel
like I did recently. I guess what I realized is that, "this moment" could
very well be the first time I have ever truly, truly, let my guard down
and let myself feel what I was feeling, and not hide behind a fake smile.
I hope this revelation will lead me to why I chose food to cover/hide my
feelings. Is it to fill the empty void so many overweight people speak of?
My mind is spinning. I feel like I have made great strides, but I can't
explain it yet. Thank you Lord, for this revelation. I believe by me realzing
this I am ready to move forward and take another step. One step at a time...